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Jan. 2nd, 2025 02:38 pmWhy is he so sweet to me? I know I don't deserve it.
I'm in the fifth circle of hell - 2 0 2 5. It seems that five years have passed and nothing has really changed. I'm the same person I was five years ago, but also entirely different.
Maybe I went insane for two years and **** was some sort of mass hallucination. This seems somewhat plausible actually. It would explain why I felt things so intensely for once, and had somewhat of a reaction to them too.
On the rare occasion I feel something these days, I just get stuck. Frozen in time, though time is the only thing that seems to have changed.
I go two steps forward, and one step back. At least that means I'm still moving forward, even if its slow. But I won't need to step back anymore if I can just leave my current situation. It feels impossible. My life is just passing me by, things are just happening to me, dissociate, I feel incoherent, my thoughts are too abstract and I have trouble articulating things, I know nothing, I truly know NOTHING, but I want to know everything, I wish things could be more linear
No matter how much I ask and beg and plead, I can't be left alone for one damn minute. I don't get any privacy and no one really fully and truly respects my boundaries. I can't wait to be responsible for myself and only myself.
I'm in the fifth circle of hell - 2 0 2 5. It seems that five years have passed and nothing has really changed. I'm the same person I was five years ago, but also entirely different.
Maybe I went insane for two years and **** was some sort of mass hallucination. This seems somewhat plausible actually. It would explain why I felt things so intensely for once, and had somewhat of a reaction to them too.
On the rare occasion I feel something these days, I just get stuck. Frozen in time, though time is the only thing that seems to have changed.
I go two steps forward, and one step back. At least that means I'm still moving forward, even if its slow. But I won't need to step back anymore if I can just leave my current situation. It feels impossible. My life is just passing me by, things are just happening to me, dissociate, I feel incoherent, my thoughts are too abstract and I have trouble articulating things, I know nothing, I truly know NOTHING, but I want to know everything, I wish things could be more linear
No matter how much I ask and beg and plead, I can't be left alone for one damn minute. I don't get any privacy and no one really fully and truly respects my boundaries. I can't wait to be responsible for myself and only myself.
